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Artists are continually reinventing ourselves.  I love when I see people after a couple years and they are new.  Musician friends do it the most I think.  All new clothes, identity, artistic expression, music style, etc.  I love the commitment, the dedication, the creativity.  So exciting.  I always wanted to do something like that but I never had the courage to go all the way.  Or the ability to decide on one style!  I always change day to day.  But once I was diagnosed I kind of lost my identity.  I have tried to rally up the ambition to start over but it keeps falling.  I guess I was looking at it from the outside in.  I was looking at it from a superficial perspective.  To go inward is what needs to happen.  Change from the inside.  However, I made my first step in Mexico by changing my name.

After I went to Mexico City to work with an Aztec medicine man for a month I came back with a new name.  AMARA.  we took the T off my name.  In Spanish Amara is like saying beloved.  Beautiful.  To be reborn was part of the ceremony and healing.  Being reborn is being renamed.  I also took my family name on my mother's side Zaragoza, as my last name.  It’s a drastic change and changing it for my career is scary because your name is how you get work right?  What if people don’t know who I am or I don’t get anymore work?  Or if people attack, you know the internet is fickle! People feel free to complain about other peoples choices a lot.  But you know what, who cares!   Some of my friends are ok calling me Amara and some don’t want to.  It’s difficult.  I am also supposed to move to a new place, so I moved to a new neighborhood.  I like it.  It feels like an adventure.